The Buddy Blog #1- Togetherness
I’d like to start by saying in no way am I any type of writer and my grammar is atrocious. I wanna mention that there will be times where the commas or semicolons are placed in a way that won’t make any sense. To me, that is the beauty of what I am trying to create; something raw, real, and genuine. I just want to share my experiences with people in hopes of helping someone through a hard time and at the same time show that someone who never did well in school can still do something they never thought they would: write...FOR FUN?!? Because if I can do something this out of my comfort zone, so can you.
The topic I want to talk about in today’s entry is Togetherness (Honestly, I don’t know if that is a real word or just slang). To me, this word is the act of being or staying together. As the famous saying goes; “There is strength in numbers”. In life, we go through shit that doesn’t make sense, shit that we don’t deserve, and shit that just isn’t fair. We have a bunch of stuff that we carry on our shoulders each day that slows us down and sometimes...we can’t handle it anymore. We feel we messed everything up to the point of no return, we feel as if we aren’t good enough, we feel singled out. These feelings can trap a person in a dark place and this is where the importance of togetherness shines through. A lot of us have found people that can help us climb out of these deep and dark places. People who have reached out their hand to pick our depressed asses up off the ground. These people show real friendship and care for you, and sometimes that is all you need to get you out of the dark. Most of the time, these people show up in your life unexpectedly. My latest experience of togetherness came just a couple of months ago. I found a friend that helped me through one of the most interesting times in my life, and I did the same for him. We first met a month before the world shut down and for the sake of the story, we shall call this dude “K”…
In that month I don’t really recall K and I talking too much. We would just say “What’s up?” or “How are you?”, nothing too deep or personal. To be honest with you, I barely knew what the dude was about; all I remember is that I thought he was a super energetic, funny, and friendly dude…pretty much an all-around good guy. During quarantine, I barely remembered who this dude was but when we got back from quarantine, it was like we knew each other for our entire lives (he and I talk about this now and then...we literally do not know why we opened up to each other so quickly. We still think there was something out of our control that led us to each other at exactly the lowest moments of both of our lives.)
There was a girl that I thought was hella cute before we went into quarantine but I never remembered her face nor did remember her name. When we got back, I quickly remembered her, and when I tell you I went crazy over this chick...I went crazy over her. It got to the point where if this chick told me to go get her a pen, I’d get her 1,000, and if this chick told me to shave my head, best believe next time you would see me I would look like an egg. I remember being so nervous around her for literally no reason. And as you can probably guess, she didn’t like me in that way and just wanted a friend. Being the hopeless romantic I am, I still thought we could be a thing eventually; and of course, nothing happened haha. This realization wrecked me and made me rethink everything I was doing and seeing this girl almost every day ruined what little confidence I had because she was a constant reminder of failure. During the little phase I had for this girl, K was there for me every step of the way, watching me fall flat on my face for this girl and he was there to pick me right back up. He helped me pick up what little pieces of myself I had left and helped to build me back up to who I am now.
Throughout one of the toughest times in my life, K was also going through one of the toughest times any person can go through. Him and his partner lost a child and eventually, that took a toll on their relationship and they broke up. Although it barely showed, he was wrecked. I remember a time where he was fighting so hard for this person to come back, that was all we talked about. His mental was probably worse than mine but he still helped me. Maybe that’s why we got so close so quickly. In a weird way, I feel like him being there for me helped him in his situation just as much as it helped me. He mentions these times now and then I never realized how down he was and how much I actually helped him. Whenever he was around me, it seemed like he was always helping and listening to me, but he always gives me credit for catching him too.
Eventually, both of us were able to climb out of the dark and become new people. From the low, came two new friends that bonded over heartbreak. I tell you this story because this friendship was built completely by just experiencing a tough situation together. Although we were going through tough times, we relied on each other to get through them. He was always listening to me, and I tried to listen to him just as much. Were these times still lonely for both of us? Sure, they are called tough times for a reason, but we knew that there was someone who cared. We knew that there was someone always willing to listen to us. What I want you guys to take away from this story is that together, we can push through the darkest times. It doesn’t matter who you are; believe it or not, people are willing to listen. There are people who genuinely want to help you. Hell, if you feel like you don’t have anyone, hit me up. I want to help you just as much as K did for me. And just know, we can get through dark times. Together.